


Ashes To Ashes, Dust To Dust

by Sintharius



Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Heavy Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-31
Updated: 2017-01-31
Packaged: 2018-09-21 05:13:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9533129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sintharius/pseuds/Sintharius
Summary: Time heals all wounds, except when it doesn't.Or Medic's life after the war with Gray Mann.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is an expansion of the events in [Rothenburg](http://archiveofourown.org/works/8305940).
> 
> The story was originally written before “The Naked And The Dead”, and updated with revealed names after the release. The Spy's name is still unknown, so I gave him one.

Returning is painful.

In his entire life with RED, Medic had sworn to never return to his hometown. That rotten place of a village that he grew up in, the result of a loveless marriage between a mad doctor and a farmer’s daughter. It even has a name to match: Rottenburg.

But here he was, standing on its streets.

He is such a hypocrite.

Medic’s steps were heavy against the paved roads of the small town. He wished he could be anywhere else, but there is nowhere he could go – not without Sniper by his side.

Ah, Sniper.

Their last farewells were still fresh in his mind. After the war against Grey Mann was over, the bushman had decided to return to Australia – to start a family, of all things – and he could not take Medic with him. Something about wanting a normal life, as normal as he could.

And that includes abandoning Medic.

_“Why, Mundy? I thought we were supposed to be forever.”_

_“I know… I’m sorry, darlin’. I wish we could have it another way, but we can’t.”_

_Medic spent his last night with Sniper crying into the bushman’s shoulders._

_The rest of the team left Mann Co. a week after, Medic included. They had no business fighting for a war that was nonexistent from the start._

Sniper’s Chronomancer weighed heavily on his shoulders. The last token of a lost love.

He keeps walking. He can’t turn back now.

***

The townsfolk did not bother to look at him as he walked by. Perhaps he had been away for so long that the mad doctor of old was only a distant memory, told by mothers to make their children behave.

Medic has no intentions of tempting fate. The last thing he wants is baggage from the past. Better to find a place to settle down and live out his remaining days, preferably in peace.

And if the lineage of mad doctors dies out with him, so be it.

***

His new home is a small and isolated cottage on the outskirts of Rottenburg, far away from his childhood house and the memories it carried. Perfect.

The price of the house is cheap, and Medic has enough cash from his job with RED to live out the rest of his life in luxury if he wanted to.

( _What use is luxury without a partner to share it with, Medic thought as he called the agency._ )

A realtor came the next day to his motel room with the offer. He forked over the cash without blinking twice. The deal was done in an hour.

The realtor did not bother to ask why he wanted the house. Medic was glad he did not ask.

***

The house was a sad little thing with its leaking roof, half torn walls and dusty insides, clearly abandoned for a long time.

At least it gives him something to occupy himself with.

Medic spent days rebuilding the roof and the walls, before cleaning up the interior and purchasing some furniture. White washed walls. Wooden floor underneath a thick carpet. A coffee table, couch and two armchairs for the living room. Wooden table and chairs in the dining room. Marble décor for the kitchen. A single bed and work desk in his bedroom. A small garden in the yard behind the house.

A birdhouse was installed in the yard, although he has no use for it. Archimedes died long ago, having lived out her life in peace. He never got new birds after the rest of his doves are gone. Too much attachment.

The thought of his doves brings him back to Sniper.

Mundy used to own an owl, aptly named Sir Hootsalot. He and Medic used to trade banters with each other in the dying lights of RED base’s backyard, with the doves cooing softly in the background and Sir Hootsalot perched on Mundy’s shoulder. The great horned owl took a liking to Medic, and he appreciated the beauty of the predator next to his own doves.

Sniper took Sir Hootsalot with him when he left Medic.

_Are you still taking care of him? Is he good to you and your family?_

_Is he even still alive?_

Medic felt alone. Without Sniper. Without his birds.

Tears pricked at his eyes. He let them fall for the first time in years.

***

Medic started writing a journal.

Back in RED and Mann Co., taking care of the team and performing experiments left little time to himself. Now, with nothing left to fight or work on, he is having more free time on his hands than what he knows to do with.

_It’s been three months since I returned to this place._

_The people do not seem to care why I am here. All the better for me and them._

_I keep thinking back to our times together, Mundy. If I could open my eyes, all of these would be just a dream, and I would be back in our bed with you. Alas, it was only a feverish dream._

***

Medic startled awake in bed before squinting his eyes at the clock on his nightstand. 8:02 AM. Sunlight poured in through the half closed blinds, pooling at Medic’s feet.

He was briefly alarmed before reminding himself that he is no longer at war.

Back then, sleep did not come easy to Medic. Nightmares haunted him often, his brain conjuring up images of his team dying, accusing him of failing to save them. Knowing that Respawn patched them up every time they die did not make it any easier.

Sniper had kept those nightmares at bay when they shared a bed.

 _I’m here darlin’,_ Sniper would hold him and whisper into his shoulder when Medic woke up from another memory of him dying to a spy robot. _We’re in base. You’re in our bed. You are safe here._

Sometimes it ended in lovemaking, Medic seeking physical proof of his existance and Sniper happily providing it. Other times they would cuddle, Medic drifting back to sleep in Sniper’s arms.

Now, without Sniper, the nightmares are returning in full force. And Sniper featured in most of them.

Sniper dying to a backstab from a Spy robot Pyro did not get in time. Sniper getting blown apart by one of Soldier’s rockets when the fellow merc fired it in a Pyrobot’s face.

Medic rubs his face. Despite having gotten several hours of sleep, he is still tired.

He slipped his glasses over his nose – he really need to get new ones soon, his current pair is taped together at the nose piece – and padded into the bathroom.

Might as well get ready for the day since he can’t sleep anymore.

***

_I got some flowers today. An old lady was selling them down the market and she looked like she could use some help._

_She asked me if I just came to the town. I told her I came to the town to retire._

He also bought several pots of flowers for his garden in addition to the bundle. The shopkeeper waved at him when he left.

When they were dating, Sniper used to give him flowers – mostly wildflowers he picked during downtime between missions. For someone that lived in the desert for a good part of his adult life, Sniper was surprisingly good with flowers.

_“Australia isn’t all dirt and sand. We do have flowers, y’know.”_

Sniper isn’t here to give him flowers anymore. He will have to get his own.

The bundle of flowers was placed in a vase on his dining table. Pheasant’s eyes, pink carnation, asphodel.

_Sorrowful rememberance._

_I will never forget you._

_My regrets follow you to the grave._

He busied himself with planting the flowers into his garden and watering them, Sniper’s voice echoing in the back of his mind as he worked.

When he finishes, Medic allowed himself a quiet smile. Sweat glistens on his brow in the dying sunlight.

***

Dinner was a quiet affair.

Medic never thought he would miss the chaos that was RED at dinner. It was loud and sometimes frustrating, but they were a team. His team. They had each other both in and out of battle.

Jeremy’s childish jokes.

Jane’s loud shouts.

Tavish’s drunken slurring.

Mikhail’s laugh.

Dell’s easy smile.

Jacques’ antics.

Mundy’s soft gaze.

Now it is just him, alone in the dining room of his home.

He wonders how the others are doing. Engineer had been gone for so long, he wasn’t even sure if the soft-spoken Texan was still alive. Scout and Heavy returned home to their family after they left. Demoman has gone back to live with his mother, and probably find work elsewhere. Soldier expressed an interest in finding Engineer, but he vanishes afterwards. Spy is still out there, backstabbing people for a living. Pyro is doing… whatever that they do.

And Sniper… _Sniper left him._

_Why did you do this to me? Where did I go wrong?_

Rage consumed Medic. The last bit of his rational mind noted that it was improper for a doctor like him to have fits of anger, but he did not care. _I’m alone in my house, I can do whatever I want._

Fifteen minutes later, he came back to himself and realized he had smashed several of his plates in his fit of rage. He sighs and begins cleaning up the mess.

At least it felt good to vent the anger out.

***

_Mundy, when did it all change? What happened to us?_

_I know you will never see this, but if you did… I just wanted to know. Why?_

The last few words were blurred as Medic’s tears strained the paper.

He slept fitfully that night, wrapped up in the Chronomancer. At least he only woke up from the nightmares once.

He got new glasses the next day.

***

Someone knocks on his door a year after he returned to Rottenburg.

It turns out to be Spy, dressed in a shirt and vest with a trench coat over his shoulders. A cardboard box is tucked under his left arm. His usual balaclava is missing.

(Medic briefly noted that this is the first time he has seen Spy maskless, for all the time they spent together.)

“Bonjour, docteur.”

Medic nods as he steps aside to let Spy in. “Guten tag, Spy. Have a seat.”

“You are probably wondering why I am here, oui?” Spy sits down on an armchair, “I am here on behalf of a mutual friend of ours… a certain Sniper.”

Medic’s face darkened at the mention of Sniper, but he says nothing. Instead he sits down on the couch facing Spy.

Spy must have noticed his discomfort, as the Frenchman continues speaking. “I was in Australia for a job and happened to come by him. He asked me to give this to you, since he has no idea where you are living.” He places the box on the coffee table.

“How did you find me? Did you track me after… after I left?”

“Non, that would be too much effort. Let’s just say that I have a few… contacts around here. Putting together the pieces is not difficult once you know where to look. Do not worry docteur, I made sure no one followed me here. Your secret is safe with me.”

Medic supposed that an old man living in a house on the outskirts of a German town can’t be inconspicuous. At least not to a Spy, and especially one that was his teammate. “Why did he do this? After such a long time…”

Spy holds up his hands in a gesture of surrender.

“I heard what happened - well, not exactly. Since you and him left Mann Co. independently of each other, I thought it was unusual considering how close you two were during the war. So I did some investigations of my own.” The rogue stands up and places a hand over Medic’s shoulder. “My meeting with Sniper only confirmed what happened.”

“It was not your fault, docteur. That lies in outside forces that both of you had no ability to control.” Spy draws back to look Medic in the eyes. “He still misses you, you know.”

Medic shakes his head. “Leave me, Spy. I need to think. And… thank you.”

“De riens. Now I shall take my leave.” Spy leaves through the still-open door, leaving Medic alone with the package and his thoughts.

***

_Spy came to see me today._

_What point are you trying to make, Mundy? Why sending me this?_

_If this is your idea of an olive branch, you were a year too late._

Medic closes his journal. His eyes drifted to the unopened package, still sitting on his table where Spy left it.

He did not open it yet, out of fear of what he would find in the box.

***

Medic finally opens the box a few days later.

( _Better to drain the wound and let it heal, than leaving it to fester._ )

The package turns out to be a photo of Sniper and a letter.

Sniper was smiling in the photo, the Hitman’s Heatmaker reclined on his shoulder as he stood on a rocky outcropping somewhere in Australia. It was one of those rare genuine smiles that Mundy shared with him whenever they were alone in RED – and Medic was honored to be one of the few people that ever saw it.

He smiled absentmindedly at the photo as he took out the letter.

He recognizes the handwriting in the letter as Sniper’s barely legible chickenscratch. It was dated three months ago – Spy must have taken great pains to keep the box safe before it reached him.

_Ludwig,_

_I trust that Jacques delivered this letter to you in person. For all his backstabbing tendencies, the spook is a reliable teammate when you trust him with serious matters._

_I know that an apology is rather late, but best late than never._

_I’m sorry for causing you pain. It was not in my intentions to hurt you._

_I signed up with RED without any thoughts on what I would do after it. Everything was so simple when I was alone._

_And then you came along. I realized too late that my heart was taken – it was in your hands all along._

_I really enjoyed our time together. Everything I felt for you was, and still is, genuine. I thought we could have had this forever, just you and me against the world. But life ain’t fair for people like us._

A bad feeling bubbled in the pit of his stomach, but he continues reading.

_The week before I left, Pauling – bless her little heart – came to me with a message. The Administrator knew of our relationship, and it violated RED’s company policy – she insisted that with the bloody robot war over, all of us are now back under RED and BLU’s juridiction. She gave me an ultimatum: Leave the team, cut off all contact with you and we both live. If I try to resist any other way, she will have us both killed – just look at what she did to Tavish and Jane._

_And she wanted to give us a heads up before the hag descends on us._

_I was so angry. After all the fighting we did for her, she turned upon us like we were nothing but pawns for her. In a way, we were._

_I couldn’t let the old hag get her filthy hands on you, love. So I left. If I had known you would also leave RED, I would have taken you with me._

_But it was too late._

Medic’s eyes blurred. Sniper was trying to protect him, and he was oblivious about it.

_After I got out of RED, I went back home. Found a little sheila that does not mind my job, or the fact that I am away for days at a time. In some ways, she reminded me of you._

_The spook came to me six months later, telling me that you and the rest of RED left after I did. Guess the Administrator did not see that coming when she blackmailed me. Bloody old hag deserved it._

_How I wished I could take it back. I wanted nothing more than to come to you, hold you in my arms and chase away your nightmares. Just like old times._

_But I have a family now, and I cannot abandon my responsibility. I hope you will understand in time._

_Please take care of yourself whenever you are, love. Know that I will always hold you in my heart, first and foremost._

_With love,_

_Mundy_

_P.S. When I left RED, I stole the Ubersaw from the armory. I wanted to have something to remember you by. Pretty sure Pauling turned a blind eye to it. Mann Co. could always make more. One Ubersaw won't be missed._

Medic smiled. Before his departure, he was allowed to take exactly one piece of Mann Co. weaponry as a gesture of goodwill from the Administration. He had declined, citing that his days of fighting are over. From the photo, it appears that Sniper had taken the Hitman’s Heatmaker. Medic knew he loved that gun.

The letter was carefully folded and placed in a decorated wooden box, meant to keep his personal items safe. He will have to get a picture frame tomorrow – for now, it was placed on his nightstand next to the clock.

Medic falls asleep that night, the Chronomancer clutched in his hand. The nightmares never came – he was at peace for the first time in ages.

***

_If you could just told me about the Administrator, Mundy… we would have worked something out together._

_But you left me instead. Now you have a wife, a kid or two and a white picket fence house. All I have is an empty house and memories._

_Why did you do this to me? I may be a doctor, but I am not defenseless. We could have gotten out together._

_We are stronger when we work together._

_What's done cannot be undone, I suppose. I hope you are at peace with your decision._

***

The picture was framed the next day, sitting on his nightstand next to the clock.

Knowing that Sniper gave up his happiness for him eased the ache in Medic’s heart a little, however he could not help but feeling the bitterness of what-could-have-beens.

He regretted not asking Spy for Sniper’s address, just so he can send letters back to the bushman. On the other hand, he did not want to disturb the little family that Mundy had made for himself.

He feels Sniper’s gaze on him from the photo, holding vigilance as he sleeps. His nightmares eventually stopped haunting him.

***

The Chronomancer went into a corner of his wardrobe, as he no longer needed its comfort.

***

Some days Medic works on his garden, tending to the flowers. He likes to feed the wild birds visiting the birdhouse and garden.

Even memories of Archimedes and his doves did not hurt as they used to be.

Other days he is content to stay indoors, reading books or watching TV. Medic had to buy two bookcases to fit his collection.

Sometimes he is tempted to find work as a doctor, returning to his experiments. He has to remind himself that he is here for retirement, and working might stir up rumors about his unsavory reputation. And that is the last thing he needs.

Somewhere along the way, Medic realizes that he's mellowed out comparing to his younger days, when he was a mad doctor eager to experiment on everything he could get his hands on. He takes it as a good thing - it allows him to have the quiet life that he dreamed of, even if it didn't turn out the way he wanted to.

***

Medic took the Chronomancer out of his wardrobe one day. It was tearing at the seams and edges, and Sniper’s scent on it has long faded. Now it smells like mothballs.

He went to a tailor to get the coat fixed that afternoon, before putting it into the keepsake box.

He might not need it anymore, but the coat still serves as a last reminder of his beloved.

Spy arranged a proxy mailbox for Medic after he delivered Sniper’s mail the second time ( _“I am not your personal courier, bushman.”_ ). They corresponded with each other via letters after that.

Every single letter was carefully folded before being put into the box.

***

_(Five years later)_

Medic is getting old.

Respawn did a good job pulling people back from the dead and patching up trauma injuries, but it did little for the normal wear and tear that all human bodies go through.

He aches constantly, and it gets worse when it rains. Some days the pain was too much and he ended up bedridden. Medic hated it, but there is nothing he could do – after all, immortality is not something he concerned himself in, only how to fix people’s injuries on the field and in his experiments.

He took in a young homeless girl he found on the streets as his companion. She tends to the house, and Medic himself when he could not get up from his bed.

He spends most of his days reading books and writing his journal. His mind is still sharp, but his body is giving out from the years of hard work both on and off the battlefields.

_It’s starting to hurt less when I think of you._

_Some psychiatrist recently called it the five stages of grief. Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance._

_Looking back at what I wrote over the years, I could see it. My denial towards our broken relationship. My anger towards you for leaving me. Wishing things could have played out differently. Depression from mourning – some days it was so bad I could not get out of bed._

_All that is left is acceptance._

_I will have to move on eventually, once my heart recognizes that our love is not something to be despaired over, but treasured. We went through battles and hardships together. We shared meals and a bed together. It is time I let all of that go, if I were to be at peace._

Medic smiles as he closes his journal.

***

Medic is informed of Spy’s demise when a courier shows up on his door on a late afternoon, with a letter addressed to him. Apparently the Frenchman was gunned down by his own employer after finishing the job and died on the way to the hospital.

_Karma has finally caught up with you, Spy._

The letter is from the BLU Scout’s mother, informing him of Spy’s death and thanking him for taking care of the rogue during their time together at RED. It also contained a carefully wrapped dagger, which Medic recognized as the Your Eternal Reward - Spy having picked it as the reward for his service with RED.

 _He was very fond of this knife when he was still alive,_ the letter said. _My son is not quite as fond, seeing how it was used against him many times in the past – and it reminded him of the time he wasted away from his father. You were the only friend he kept in contact, so I want you to have it. I have no use for it._

Both items goes into his keepsake box, as a memento of a teammate lost.

He writes to Sniper that night. The bushman replies with a condolence to both Medic and the Scout’s mother.

***

Sometimes he wonders if Soldier managed to find Engineer. The two of them were close – like him and Sniper, he suspected – and Jane was noticeably downtrodden when Dell went missing shortly before the war ended.

He could only hope that the couple found their own peace.

***

_Ten years later_

He started being bedridden two months ago.

His caretaker is worried, but Medic waves it off. He knew in his weary bones that he is dying, no use in worrying – it’s not like she could do anything but make him comfortable anyway.

If anything, he wants Sniper to be with him when he dies. Sniper’s reply to his last letter – sent two weeks ago – was “I will come as soon as I can. Wait for me.”

He asked for his journal and a pen. Might as well write the last entries of his journal when he still has the strength to do so.

With hands that are no longer steady, he begins to write.

_I don’t think I have much time left._

_I have lived a fullfilling life with many adventures. I learned so many things, and did even more. People called me a mad doctor for my actions, yet I do not regret them. I did it for my curiosity, my thirst for knowledge – and my team. The people I called friends._

_If there is something I regret in this life, it would be my relationship with Mundy. The one steady rock I had and it was gone due to miscommunication._

_Mundy, if you ever read this, I want you to know that although I wished things could have turned out different, I am happy with what I had with you. My memories of you will be the light that guides me as I pass into the afterlife._

_Live your life to the fullest, Mundy. Enjoy the beauty of life and love. When your time comes, I will be waiting._

_This will be the last entry of this journal. I am joining Jacques and the others soon._

_Forever,_

_Ludwig_

He placed the journal and Sniper’s photo into the keepsake box. They will be safe there until they can be given to Sniper, as per his instructions to his caretaker.

With his last wish done, Medic lies down and closes his eyes. He is so _tired_.

He will just take a nap until Sniper arrives.

***

The caretaker found Medic dead in his bed that night, the doctor having passed away in his sleep.

He was still smiling.

***

Medic was buried in his family plot at Rottenburg. No one came to the funeral when they realized that the old man living on the edge of town was really the last member of Rottenburg’s infamous lineage of mad doctors. He never had any friends in the town anyway, preferring to keep to himself.

The next day, the caretaker noticed a stranger walking towards Medic’s grave. The man is tall and lanky. He wears a vest over his shirt, brown pants and a wide brimmed hat. His eyes are hidden behind yellow aviators. He stands out from the crowd like a sore thumb.

He kneels over Medic’s grave before putting a hand on the gravestone, tracing the letters there.

She comes over to him. “Are you looking for the doctor?”

The man stands up and looks at her. “Ah… yeah. An old mate o’ mine. Family was kinda famous here. Think he’s the last one o’ them.”

Medic never talked much about his previous life as a doctor, except for one man. That man could very well be standing in front of her now.

“Are you Mr. Mundy, by any chance?”

The stranger stills, and she thought she saw his eyes widening behind the aviators. “How did you know my name?”

“The doctor mentioned a Mr. Mundy from Australia in his will. Since you don’t seem to be from around here and you are looking for him, I thought you could be him.”

His face falls. “When I got the letter two weeks ago, I tried to come as soon as I could…” And he had. But Medic could not wait for him.

She nods. “Would you like to visit his home? He left some things that he would like you to have.”

“…That would be nice. Lead the way, miss.”

***

Sniper’s eyes widened at the sight of Medic’s house. _So this is where Medic was all the time?_

“Please have a seat. I will be back shortly.” And she is gone in a flash.

The house is small and cozy. It reminded him of their stories, told in quiet nights between the seemingly endless battles that the Administrator put them through. Medic had always wanted something like this.

_When all of this is over, I want a quiet place… somewhere away from prying eyes. Just you and me, together._

Sniper hung his head. He was unable to keep that promise.

The caretaker returns with an intricately carved wooden box in her hands. She places it in front of Sniper.

“The doctor wanted you to have this. It’s his last wish before he died.”

He blinks at her. “Thank you, miss. Can you leave me for a moment?”

“Certainly. Please, take your time.” And with that, she departs.

With shaking hands, Sniper opens the box.

Inside is a collection of all the letters he wrote to Medic after their separation, and many other items. His old coat. A dagger, the one Spy called Your Eternal Reward; Ludwig must have gotten it after Jacques died. Small trinkets from the other mercs.

And in the middle of them all, a large leather-bound journal.

Medic’s words inside the journal brings him to tears.

_My memories of you will be the light that guides me as I pass into the afterlife._

One last promise to Medic, and he could not keep it.

***

Sniper returns to Australia the next day, after staying the night at the house.

Ludwig is gone. There is nothing more for him here.

The keepsake box sits heavily in his briefcase, the last reminder of his beloved.

_Live your life to the fullest, Mundy. Enjoy the beauty of life and love. When your time comes, I will be waiting._

“I promise, my love.” He said aloud to the empty room before departing.

***

_Many decades later, a group of Overwatch agents visited the former town of Rottenburg – now a city named Rothenburg, following the stories of their German knight._

_They visited the grave of the Medic – it was worn and barely recognizable since the family died out with him, leaving no caretaker - and his old residence. The house was leveled by an omnic air strike during the First Omnic Crisis, and was turned into a memorial for the lives lost._

_From there, a tourist guide pointed them in the direction of the Robot Hills – the name given to the place where the battles with Grey Mann’s robots took place, said to be haunted by the last member of the city’s ancient lineage of mad doctors._

_That night, the team’s young demolition expert dreamed of a doctor in a white lab coat and glasses._

_“Mundy’s grandson? How interesting. Tell your grandfather I said hi.”_

_He left a photo of his grandfather at the doctor’s grave the next day._

_“The doc said hi, gramps.”_

**Author's Note:**

> Medic was a field surgeon during WWII and thus would be in his early to mid 50s during the Gravel War (and possibly late 50s during MvM), making him one of the older mercs. Sniper is canonically 30 years old in the comic “Blood In The Water”, and thus is younger than Medic - so barring unfortunate incidents, Medic is most likely to be the first of the TF2 team to die of old age.
> 
> Visit me on [Tumblr](http://www.sintharius.tumblr.com)!


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